Friday, December 10, 2010

Finding Balance During Unbalanced Times...

I despise when it gets dark early. When it feels like it is 10 pm, but it’s really 5! The darkness feels like a trap. Like I am trapped in some timeless void, where things are backwards. Where nothing feels real. One minute it is November the next a whole month has flown by. Time is beginning to become meaningless. Time is just flying. Where is it going so fast? Not sure, but it is in a hurry. What are we speeding up to? What does the future hold? No one can know for certain, but it is a good idea to keep balanced amid the chaos of life. How does one stay balanced, or try to achieve some idea of what balance is? Well, there are a lot of ways: yoga, meditation, breathing exercises, tai chi, chi gong, massage, hiking, running (to some extent), taking time to pause and listen to the inner body. Anything that gets you to quiet the mind chatter for a moment to pause and listen to the inner awareness, the inner voice, the heart, to just pause and listen. “I can’t quiet my mind,” “I don’t know how to meditate,” “I have too much going on to pause for anything,” I have heard many people say. Yes, quieting the mind chatter takes time, it’s true, but everyone can do it with time and practice. How does 5 minutes a day sound? I think we all have 5 minutes. Don’t know how to meditate, there are many books, cd’s, and online follow along’s out there. I also teach people how to meditate, get quiet and listen. I have worked with some seriously active people and we all have the ability to get quiet, even if it is just for a minute or two. Once you learn how to meditate, the great thing about it is that it is free. Supplies you will need to meditate: 1. You 2. Your Breath 3. Your Inner Awareness 4. Something to sit on. Do you have all of those things? Only one of them can be bought, so I do hope you come prepared! You can do it anywhere, the office, the dinner table, the doctor’s office, at school. Any where. It is really that simple. The cool thing is there are numerous scientific studies that now prove how meditation changes your brain, literally rewires it. Don’t believe me? Google it!

The key here is balance people. We live in a busy busy world, that is always trying to throw information at us, people are talking to us, we are juggling jobs, households, children, significant others, workout routines, dinner parties, holidays, vacations, dogs, cats, it is easy to see how our own personal care and commitment to ourselves can be at the bottom of the list. There are only 24 hours in a day. But the cool thing about yoga, breathing and meditation is you can spend just 5-10 minutes on it a day and see a huge difference. Can’t seem to find time? Wake up 5-10 minutes earlier. Do it before bed. Watch along with me as I lead you in a simple morning routine and evening routine (video to come out soon). Balance is key. So if you are juggling all of these things and constantly on the go, where does the peace come in? Where does the quiet come in? Where is your soul getting fed? What is the flip side of the coin to rush and go? The answer, Pause and Listen. We all have about 16 waking hours a day, with everything we are juggling, there is not a lot of time when you really boil it down. But 5-10 minutes is nothing. Once a day is great, twice is better. But be kind to yourself. Be compassionate to yourself. Keep discovering the inner awareness. Keep pausing and listening. Keep doing something once a day that is just for you, even if it is only 5 minutes. Stay true to you. Quit beating yourself up about this thing or that, what you did, or didn’t do. Just breathe right here in this moment. This is the most powerful moment, this one right here. Can you stay present to it? Can you get out of your head for a moment, focus on the breath and see what this moment has to offer you? Can you set aside the to-do lists that our minds create, or better yet add 5 minutes of breathing to the list? Also add to the list, love someone today, say hi to a stranger, do something unexpected for someone, be amazing and be someone’s inspiration.

Finding balance in an unbalanced world is not as hard as it may seem. One tip for those that get overwhelmed easily (I may or may not be one of those people ;) think of adding something into your life instead of feeling like you have to change a bunch of things to get “balanced.” It is as simple as adding 5 minutes of breathing/getting quiet time. Balance is the key that will open the door to a life well lived among the chaos of the outside world. So that the next time someone says, how are the holidays treating you, crazy right? You can politely say, no they are great. Not crazy at all. I feel peaceful. They may look at you funny, but then you can walk away smiling, knowing they will be asking you later how are you keeping your cool.

So pick up your glass of egg nog, your champagne, or your Bailey’s and coffee and toast with me to a holiday filled with balance, a new year filled with love and peace and a life lived with grace!

Love and light,


Thursday, December 2, 2010

I have to wait until...

How many times have you said it? "I have to wait until...I have money, a better car, a different job, more experience, a bigger house, an office, more time, less stress, a money tree grows in the backyard." Seriously, we can all come up with list, upon list, upon list of reasons why we are not following the urges that motivate us.

Maybe you have always wanted to live in another country. But the excuses of, I have to stay here and have a job, pay bills and continue to make my life here. Besides, how would I make money in another country anyway. You say. Maybe you have always wanted to write a screenplay, act in a theatrical production, sing in a band, or drive across the country. But you always come up with reasons why you shouldn't and they usually involve time and money. The truth is we really can do anything we want to do if we just get out of our own way. By this I mean that if you really wanted to move to another country and live for a bit, you could. But do you really want to? You could join the peace corp, live in an ashram for free, or work as a volunteer at a number of different organizations and have your rent paid for. So, what is stopping you? You say your mortgage, kids, family, job, etc. Well the truth is you can really do anything you want. Bryon Katie says "if you really wanted something you would have it now, so you must not want it that bad." I finally just understood what she meant by that. Because it is true if you really wanted something you could have it, but the problem is you are in your own way.
You just have to get really clear about what it is that you want. What do YOU want? Not what do your parents want you to do, what you think you should do, but what do YOU want for you?

After you have gotten clear about that, get out of your own way. Don't let your beliefs of "this will never work, why am I writing this screenplay it will never make any money, I can't get another job in a field I have always wanted I will never make good money." I am proof that you can switch into a career you have always wanted to. I am proof that you can leave a job that you hate, but that paid you well and make it on a path that you love. I have certainly had my bumps in the road since I switched my path, it has not been easy and there has been chaos along the way. But such is what happens when you step more into your true essence and let go of those things you thought you Had To Be to survive.

There is a great letter written by Martha Graham. "In it she says there is a unique expression that wants to be shown through you and you are the only one that can give that expression. If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. You do not even need to believe in yourself, or your work. You just have to keep open and aware directly of the URGES THAT MOTIVATE YOU. No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at any time. There is just a divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others."

The first time I heard this I was in a yoga class and I cried. It moved me to my very core. I had been living so far from the urges that motivate me (that little voice that tells you to do those things you always wanted to do since a kid like travel, write, paint, dance, act, sing). I had been living very far from those urges and was caught up in the way I thought I was supposed to live on this planet. Working hard, hating my job, but making money and too exhausted to do much else. Being somebody I thought I had to be, but not being true to myself and my need for freedom and creativity. When this letter got read to me, I cried. As if my very soul was asking me to wake up to all that I was, or am. To quit hiding behind this false perception of who I thought I should be. To start following those urges that motivate me and do something about that inner voice that always tried to speak up, even when I said be quiet. The voice had grown quiet, but the urges continued and this letter made me aware that there were others like me. Dissatisfied people that weren't following their inner urge. I didn't feel so all alone in this big society of people telling me to do one thing when I desperately wanted to do something else. There are others like me.

So what are your urges? Are there things that you used to really enjoy, but gave up for some reason? What motivates you? What areas of your life are you bored in? What areas could you give more life to?

Last week at Agape, Michael Beckwith (you may remember him from The Secret) said that if we are bored in any way, that that is a blockage to our creative source, our divine source. If we are bored we are blocking our own potential from emerging. Where are you bored? I know what you are thinking..."I am bored at work, so what are you telling me Erin, quit my job? Ha ha ha, not easy to do and then what, are you going to pay my bills?" Well the answer to that is no I will not be paying your bills. And I am not saying to quit your job. I am saying to look at your life, really look at it and see if you are bored in any area. Then to pay attention to that and begin to do things to make you not bored in that area of life. Maybe start a group at work that involves doing an activity at lunch once a week in an area you enjoy. Get to know a co-worker that you don't already know. There are many options, and maybe quitting your job is what will end up being the best thing for you, who knows? I certainly don't, that is up to you to find out. I CAN say that quitting the restaurant job that I was working at, making great money (cash, every night) was by far the best thing I have ever done for myself. But I was beyond miserable and kept working because I thought I had to to make money. Once I changed that belief system and quit, my whole perspective changed. My energy changed, my creativity increased, my outlook changed. I went through a lot of healing and releasing parts of me that I thought I was and that was painful, but the end result is a more authentic and creative me. I feel like myself again for the first time in a long time and I feel good about that. So that is my experience, but we are all different and we all have our own path to follow.
So, what do you want your life to look like? Paint that picture in your mind and begin putting energy towards that picture every day. Just make sure you paint it exactly like you would like it and leave out the negative stuff. Just focus positive energy towards it everyday. Stop and listen to those urges that motivate you. See where you could be open to them even more.

Don't wait until! Start doing something today that motivates you. Take it one step at a time. You will feel good taking those steps and who knows, maybe one day you will be running towards that motivation. It feels good and it feels free. Trust me.

Much love and light,

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

What are we fighting for?

While having a conversation with a neighbor and fellow yoga teacher this morning we were sharing about our lives, where we are going and what is new. She mentioned that she might get a new job doing exactly what she has been wanting to do and since she is about to graduate with this exact degree, she would have a job doing that. So what is the problem you might ask?

It is all happening too easily. Granted in addition to that, she would have to give up some yoga jobs that she has and her life would change drastically pretty quickly, but this job is exactly what she has been dreaming for and wanting.

It is also the case when the right relationship comes in your life. I think a lot of us dream and scheme about the type of person that we want in our life. We make lists and have visions of how that person will look, act, love, etc. Then when that person comes into our life, because we have worked on our belief system that he/she does exist and that we are worthy of that kind of love, some of us get freaked out. Like wait, that was way too easy, there must be something wrong with this person.

Both of these examples make me think of fighting. We have been trained to think that you have to fight for things, i.e. work really hard, pay your dues, put in your time. So much so that when something comes too easily we think that there is something wrong with it. On top of that, when we begin to get really clear about what we want and vision it and then it comes, it scares us because it usually means big change. Sometimes we are comfy with the way things are, even though we gripe and complain and wish they were different. When they change and something better comes in, we get scared. "Well I thought this is what I wanted, but now I am not sure", we say.

So why do we think that all of the good things in our lives come from "fighting" for them? Why do we think we have to work hard for the good stuff? Why do we feel if we don't make an effort towards something that there is something wrong with it?

I believe the answer to these questions is due to the way we were raised, society's views and conditioning. We are conditioned that if we work hard, someone will say good job and believe it or not we become conditioned to wait for those words "good job." So at a very early age we are always saying "Mom, mom look what I just did/drew/made", etc and mom says "good job." Doesn't sound that bad, right? It isn't, but it is something to ponder. Where do we wait for the "good job" in our lives now as adults? Can we just accept something good when it comes to us without effort? Can we not question it?

Amma, also known as the hugging guru says that "love is effortless." So my deduction on why good things just fall in our laps sometimes without effort is because they are meant to be and well so what if we didn't work hard for them. Define working hard anyway. It's relative. And it is just a perception that we hold. It is a belief system that we need to let go of, the idea that we have to "work hard" for everything in our lives.

So take a deep breath. Breathe in and vision all of the things you want to create in your life. Breathe out those things no longer serving you. Focus each breath this way for about 15 minutes or more if you can. Visualize. Allow. Surrender.

Start letting in and allowing all the good to come into your life. Don't run from it when it comes. It is what you wanted, right? If not, get more clear about what you want. Accept the "negative" things and rejoice the positive.

Repeat this mantra: I am available to more good then I have ever experienced, realized, or manifested before! Open your arms and receive.

Love and light,


Monday, November 8, 2010

Waking Up to Love

My best friend got married this weekend. I was in the wedding and got to see all of the festivities from start to finish. Nichole and I have never liked each other's boyfriends in college. It brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart to see her so happy with her now husband. I really like him a lot and know that they make a great match. So as I was surrounded by love, in the deep sense, not the superficial kind, I am reminded how we can all wake up to love even more.

There is a picture of a heart with the word love across it that hangs on the wall opposite my bed. I put it right where I can see it every morning. I want to remind myself that I am love, that I do love, and to call love into my life in all forms every single day. So every morning without hesitation, I open my eyes and take a moment to look at the picture of love.

It is a reminder to live from my heart and to allow myself to stay open to the ever-present love that is all around us at all times, with or without a significant other to share it with. Of course, having someone to share it with is amazing, but the true love, the unconditional love is always there if we just let go of the baggage many of us carry on our heart. We have all been through many trials and tribulations, things that can make our hearts close up, never to have to feel those horrible feelings ever again. We have all lost loves that make our hearts ache so deeply we don't ever want to hand our hearts over again for fear of that loss. There lies the problem. So we begin to build walls around our hearts, sometimes fortresses, or castles of such thickness that any sledgehammer, drill or piece of machinery could not knock them down, no matter how hard it tried.

Can we knock our walls down and be more open? From someone who knows a thing or two about having walls and then knocking them down, it is a much more free feeling. But it does not happen overnight. It takes time, patience and compassion. But once the walls start coming down you are able to feel that love, the love that is always around. It is such a blissful feeling. I hope that everyone can feel it. I believe it can happen. Why do we stay closed off to it? Why does it seem safer to be angry and/or emotionally unavailable? I think because after so long of being closed off to a lot of feelings that just becomes "who we are." If we really let go of our pain and anger, then who would we be? The ego gets in the way because it makes us believe that that is who we are, how we have always been and if that goes away we will not really be ourselves. In fact it is just the opposite. We become more than we ever thought was possible. Our imaginations could never have even fathomed what we can become, because we are still looking at things with the blinders on. The blinders only allow us to see a small portion of life, of ourselves and of those around us. When we begin to take them off, we see there is soooo much more than we have ever known just waiting for us to acknowledge it.

Can we take our blinders off? Can we stop associating who we are with our feelings and attaching ourselves to our own pain and suffering? Can we knock down our walls? Can we begin to let a deeper love in than we have ever known before? I say Yes!

The light from the sun feeds us and keeps us alive. Get in touch with the light. Let it penetrate through the pain and darkness. Open up and receive it. Don't be afraid to let it in.

So take a moment and really see all the love around you. Wake up to it. Remind yourself everyday that you are love and you can have that kind of love. It is really that simple. Stop associating with the pain and suffering. Stop feeding into the collective society's consciousness of fear. Stay true to your heart. Take time to pause and listen to it. It will give you the answers you are longing for. Let's all wake up to love...

Much Love and Light,

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Masks We Wear

As Halloween has come to an end, it makes me think of disguises. Of not being able to recognize people. They are all dressed up with wigs, masks, makeup and look nothing like their true selves. That reminds me of the masks we wear in everyday life that keep our true inner essence from shining through. Think for a moment of all the masks you wear on a daily basis: family member, daughter, son, friend, school, work, social, anti-social, workout, business, cook, pedestrian, driver, etc. There is a long list that we fit in to and we act differently with each different set of "masks" we put on. For instance, you don't act like you are at a bar when you are at work, or maybe you do and that is what it is. But you see what I am trying to say.

We wear many different masks in this world. The trick is to see if you are just wearing the mask and covering up your true inner nature, or if you can still be in certain roles, doing certain things, but allowing consciousness to come through. Allowing yourself to be present no matter what role, or mask is there.

Sometimes we are so hidden behind our masks that we don't even know who we really are any more. That is why it is so important to do the inner work. To check in on a daily basis and meditate and see what is trying to come through you. Pausing for a moment from a busy day to get quiet and listen. Who are you? What do you want?

The masks are sometimes really hard for us to take off, but when we do we can get real about who we are and what we want. Sometimes that person might shock you. You may think I would never do "fill in the blank here" and suddenly that is what you want to do. I started painting, doing ballet, going to places I wouldn't normally go, all because I got rid of who I thought I was. Again the limitation talk. But it is relevant. Especially at Halloween with all of our masks.

So take some time to take off the masks and be who you really are. Whoever that may be, whatever that looks like. Just be with it and investigate it.

Now that Halloween is over and the masks have been stored away for next year, take time to investigate the masks that keep you from being who you truly are. Take them off for a while and walk around without that added weight. Do a little dance, write, go mountain climbing, biking or take a vacation. Do something that makes you feel good all the way to your soul. Yoga is great for that! You don't need the masks any more. Give yourself permission to just be you, naked without the mask. But totally alive and open!

That is the biggest treat you can give yourself and no one can trick you out of it!

Love and light,

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Love the process

The process of life. The process of learning, of falling, of getting back up and rising higher than before. The process of being turned upside down shaken really hard and then put upright again, feeling all jumbled.

This life that we are living is a process and there are high times and there are low times. There are people that come in our life, significant others, friends, family and there are people that go. We have delicious romances and we don't know how long they will last. They may only be temporary, they may be forever. Things happen, traumatic events in our lives, people leaving, loves ending, amazing events, blissful experiences, magnificent people.

Can we go day to day and not label them good or bad? Can we trust in the process and see the divine in all that happens? Can we trust the process even more? Can we be more open and receptive, more in the flow of life, breathing in each experience and taking it in processing it as it comes. Not reacting to it, just being with it, watching it.

Loving it...the whole process. Just loving each part, good or bad. That is all that it is...a process. Sometimes there is a deeper meaning that is trying to reach us, that is calling us to pause and listen. To see the whole picture, not just are little panoramic view. To take the blinders off and really look around. Pause and Listen...right now. What is your breath trying to tell you? What is your body trying to tell slow down? To speed up? To just stop altogether? Stop and tune in and see. Check in to the experience that is happening right now inside, the lungs filling up, expanding then deflating, contracting. The heart pumping, the blood flowing, the breath moving, the stomach digesting. Stop and tune in to it all. Be with this magical body that does all of these things for us. Meditate with that. Just sitting, breathing and tuning in. It is fascinating. This is the process, or part of it.

Love the process. All of it. Pause and listen. What is the universe trying to tell you right now. Pause and listen.

Love and Light

Wednesday, October 27, 2010


Follow your magnetism. Who/what are you magnetized to? My dear friend Larisa gave me a great piece of advice, she said when it comes to relationships, any relationship that is in our life...follow what you are magnetized to. Instead of questioning it and wandering if it is right, or wishing it was this way or that, simply follow what you are magnetized to. Don't question it. Just follow. Don't wish it was different...just follow.

I find myself being magnetized to people all the time and wonder why. Especially in relationship with the opposite sex. I think, this person is not exactly good for me and not on the same path as me, why am I attracted to them? For me it is more than just looks that attracts me to someone, there is an energy there and when I feel that energy, I know that I am being magnetized. For me it is always about energy. We all have the ability to tune into that and become sensitive to the energy around us. Then we can begin to follow the energy and see where it takes us. But we must first become conscious of it.

Larisa says that when we are magnetized to someone there is an energy there that wants to heal. We are all mirrors of each other and sometimes we are magnetized to someone to get a healing gift for ourselves from them. Sometimes there may be something about that person that drives us so crazy that we can't even stand that person, but maybe that is something in ourselves that needs healing.

For instance, maybe your significant other is always really defensive about things and that upsets you. But then you begin to notice that you are always really defensive and never realized it. So the gift was in you realizing your defensiveness and working on it personally so that you can let it go and be able to stay more open to others. Maybe you and that person no longer have a relationship, but their gift remains. So getting really conscious about why you are no longer together and seeing the gift in the relationship is key. Even if the relationship was horrible, what gift can you take from it? Learn to look for the gifts in all of life's situations, both good and bad. If you want to label them that way.

Just stay open, stay in the flow, look for the gifts and follow the magnetism.

Love and light,

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

What limitations are you putting on yourself?

I have been feeling very free lately. Not so worried about what people think of me if I say certain things, dress a certain way, or do different things. I never realized how I was putting myself into my own box. I came to the realization a few months ago that I had a fear of being trapped, that in my deepest of depths I wanted to be free. I thought freedom meant having money to be able to travel any where whenever I wanted to and if I did not have that money that I would be stuck. That was my biggest fear. I had to come to realize that I am free in this very moment. That I am not stuck or trapped, but that the limitations that I was putting on myself were making me feel that way.

Today I have begun to see just how much I was limiting myself. In fact, the self definitions that we hold is our biggest limitation. If we think we are trapped, we will feel that way. If we believe ourselves to be anything that starts with "I Am" we have already put ourselves in a box. It is about getting rid of limitations that we put on ourselves by not being attached to any one aspect of what it is that we do. Who we are is not made up of the laundry list of things we have done, continue to do, or plan to do. Who we are is a divine expression choosing to have these experiences. Go deep and ask yourself the question "Who Am I?" Really try to discover who that person is. It may surprise you to realize you are not all of those things that you think you are, or the labels that we put on ourselves. Once those begin to strip away you feel more and more free, able to act in ways and do things you previously thought you could not.

Things that just keep coming up for me that I am working with:

1. No limitations-stop putting yourself in boxes and let go of all the I Am's until the only thing that is left is I Am that I Am.

2. Quit having expectations of people or situations. Realize that people are going to do what they are going to do and you can't change them. Be content with them the way they are and love what is, or let them go. But quit fighting the never ending battle of wishing things were different. As Larisa Stow says: Get real with the way things are, instead of how you want them to be. So true. We have lots of expectations, don't we?

3. Stop questioning yourself. You are a vast awareness of knowledge if you just tap in.

4. Don't have attachments to outcomes, people, things, etc. So what if you had one amazing night with one particular person, don't get attached to the idea of ever seeing him again, just put that little memory into the vault and take it out when needed. Just don't get attached to him. The Buddhists believe attachment is one of the causes of suffering and indeed it is. Stop and take inventory of those things you are attached to and think what it would be like without them...suffering. Now work on becoming less attached. Sounds easy, right? Yeah not so much, but the first step is to become aware.

5. Have fun and act like a kid as much as possible. Today I climbed a tree, laid down in grass, built sand castles and ran through an open field with my favorite 3 year old on the planet. It was divinely simple and fun. Exactly how life should be.

6. Know that you are free right here in this moment. Free to do what you please, free to choose to be present and aware, completely open or closed. What do you choose?

Love and light,

Monday, October 25, 2010

Energy Efficiency

When we think of energy efficiency, we tend to automatically think of turning off lights, unplugging unused electrical equipment and efficient heating and cooling options. But the energy efficiency I am referring to is our own personal, inner energy. Our bodies are made up of energy. When we are tired, we sometimes say I have low energy today, or when we are hyper we say, I have lots of energy. We really are made up of a vast array of energetic pathways that run all through our bodies in all different directions.

Just like any electrical piece of equipment, sometimes parts don't work right, sometimes it breaks down and needs repair and sometimes there is a short circuit. In body energetics this would be called a blockage. There is something stuck in the body that is preventing a flow of energy to a certain part. Like when water is running through a hose and you kink the hose and the water stops running, sometimes kinks form and stop energy from passing through. These "kinks" can show up as knots in the body, colds, flu, pain in certain areas, tightness, or a vast array of other symptoms.

How do the kinks form, you may ask? From our day to day lives and the pressures we put on our bodies. From us not tuning inward and listening to our bodies and giving ourselves a break. From being stressed, from not speaking our truth, from not being content with a situation, from work, from driving, etc. Our bodies are holding on to so much, they may even be holding on to past trauma, things from childhood, or even as far back as something from the womb. As scary as that sounds it can all be worked with and worked through by people who do energy work. I do energy work, as well as many of my friends and there are many different techniques. But it all works on getting stuck energy out and removing it from the body, as well as doing healing massage. On top of that, discussing any relevant concerns, issues or frustrations that you are working on is helpful. Not holding things in. There are many of us who feel that being silent about their problems is better than sharing them, but truthfully you need to vent and let them out sometimes. Even if it is just to a good friend. Share and release. Get rid of that energy so that it doesn't stick with you and get released in another way.

It is also important to pay attention to who/what you spend your energy on. If you hang out with a certain person and always feel drained after you spend time with them, maybe it is a good idea to distance yourself for a bit. Energy efficiency works in all areas of your life. If you go to work everyday and hate what you do and where you work and are negative the whole time you are there, but it pays well and that is why you stay, your body will begin to tell you things sometimes in the form of pain or sickness. It is the whole idea of being content with the way things are, or changing them. But not being negative and taking your stuff out on others. That is giving your negative energy to the world and that is what we need to cut down on. When walking by others on the street, how awesome is it to just say "hi", or to get an unexpected "hi" and "have a nice day" from a stranger. It sounds small, but this is one big step in the right direction. Say "hi" in an elevator. Tell people when they leave to "have a nice day", I do it all the time.

Be content with where you are, with what you have and live in gratitude for everything you have in your life right here in this moment. That is the best way to begin to cultivate energy efficiency right now. Beginning to clear out those things, people, situations that no longer serve you, that make you feel less than the shinning, beautiful expression that you are. Start today to conserve your energy. To use it on things to better yourself, your future and the world around you. Watch how as your energy changes into a more free-flowing, loving energy it begins to shift those around you. It is a ripple affect. Just like a rain drop in a pond that sends out ripples, your energy radiates out to those that come into contact with you. Don't take my word for it, try it for a day. Try to stay in the positive flow, to say hi to strangers, to be in the moment. Try it and see what happens, no matter your situation and whatever excuses you can come up with for not trying it. Just try it and see.

Love and light,

Monday, October 18, 2010

Where are we efforting?

I watched the movie River of Love, a movie about Amma the "hugging guru" from India. It was such a beautiful movie and Amma really lives true to her word. She was asked in the video doesn't she get tired from the long days of sitting and hugging for hours on end, usually thousands of people in a day. To that question she replied, "Love is effortless."

I have thought a lot about that statement. I have wondered why in my own life I get so tired. I am not working long hours any more, I am doing work that makes me happy. So why? I sometimes get crabby and wonder why? Usually when I am tired. Why am I tired so often? What am I efforting towards that is exhausting me? Where is my light not shinning and what causes it to turn off? Where am I not in the flow?

If love is effortless, where am I putting too much effort that is making me tired? It is something to think about. Until next time...

Love and light!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

A little food for thought...

Things, both good and bad show up in our life as they are supposed to. They show up with the divine timing of the universe and when something unfavorable shows up it may be a way for us to go deeper. To look at things differently, to be more real. The real point is that every moment is valuable. That people will always come and go. That this body, this earth, these material things around us are not permanent. We must cherish every person, good or bad in our life to give us the lessons that we need. The information that we need to take with us on our journey. To thank them. To hug them and tell them we love them when they leave, because we never know when we may see them again. If we can just let go of the pain in our hearts. If we can just get real with ourselves and see how precious this life really is, then we can begin to see the love that is at the very depth of everyone.

If we can just take our own sledgehammers to our own walls, knock them down and start over. Start at the beginning. When there were no walls to begin with. I am sick of my walls. I am sick and tired of working so hard on pushing everyone away. It is a lot of work. It is so much easier to just be yourself. To just be loving and open. It hurts less. It changes others more and allows them to be more open. I am tired of walls. I am tired of sledgehammers. I am tired of only seeing cracks of sunlight peeking in, when I want the whole sun to shine upon me and those around me. A crack of sunlight can change darkness into morning, but the light of the whole sun can wake up a planet. It is time to start waking up. It is time to stop just letting the cracks of sun in and start allowing it all to shine through. I am tired. I want to wake up. I want others to wake up around me. I feel like no matter how much sleep I get I am still tired. Like I am in an eternal dream world where life is a bit dead around me. People walking like zombies in their sleep induced states, not fully aware of what they are doing to each other, to the planet to their own psyches. This is the dream. This is what we need to wake up from.

So today we begin again. We open our eyes maybe for the first time ever and see the world and its inhabitants as they really are. We see the divine in everything and we acknowledge that. We are a little softer, a little sweeter, with a little less stress in our bodies. We treat each other with a little more kindness, knowing we are all the same, we all hold the same light within us. Today we begin again. Today we wake up.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Our inner self talk...

Tonight while doing an exercise that I learned in my yoga training called inquiry I came to some interesting realizations. First off, inquiry involves another person sitting with you and asking you two questions, giving you time to respond and talk as long as you want. The first question is "what are you experiencing right now" the second is "how does it feel to acknowledge that." So you sit and get quiet with yourself and really tune inwardly about how you are feeling right at that moment. The other person does not engage with you they just hold space for how you are feeling. It is a great way to see how quickly our emotions change and how they pass, one into the other and that is happening all day everyday. Sometimes we can let ourselves get so caught up in an emotion that it consumes us and can bring us down. Inquiry really shows you how quickly that can pass and that you can begin to become the witness to your thoughts and emotions and watch them come and go without judgement.

While I was doing my inquiry tonight, I at one point was feeling very proud of myself for accomplishing my 500 hour yoga teacher training and for really having come a long way in a short amount of time considering all the struggles I had been through in the last year and a half.

I presented a workshop on Saturday about the feminine energy and I thought it went really well and opened a lot of doors for people. So while explaining all of this in my inquiry process, this inner voice said quit talking about yourself so much, get off your high horse. I paused for a moment and then continued to talk about myself and to be ok with that. It is so crucial to acknowledge our hard work in our lives and how far we have come. For me this was really important for two reasons, one I don't give myself enough outward credit, really speaking it out and letting myself hear how far I have come. Secondly, it was interesting to hear my own inner critic saying stop talking about yourself, listen to how boastful you sound. It was interesting to hear that after all the work I have done on myself. We are our own harshest critic, so knowing that that will always be there it is important to acknowledge and then decide whether or not we are going to listen to it. I chose not to and continued talking about myself. But it is almost scary to hear how judgmental we can be of ourselves. Even of just speaking nicely out loud about ourselves. For me this was a huge revelation.

Also, we did some art this evening in my group that I put together. My roommate led the art project and encouraged us to just let the painting flow and not think of what you are doing or trying to control it in any way. I heard my inner critic again saying this looks silly, etc. But the minute I let all of that go something beautiful came on the page.

So letting go of our perceptions of how we think things should look like or be. Knowing that is just the inner critic thinking it knows better, knows what we need or want. That is really just our ego, afraid of us letting go. Knowing that when we let go the magic happens. Something more powerful, more creative takes over and the ego is no longer in control. Something bigger is moving our paintbrush, playing our instrument, or writing a great piece of work. Something profound and beautiful comes out of that and we feel it on a much deeper level and others experience our work on deeper levels. That is when you can really say that creative work moved me. So it is time to stop listening to that inner critic and start letting go and giving into the present moment. Giving into the magic of what is. Acknowledge what the inner critic has to say, mentally say thank you for your concern, but today I am going to do this instead of listen to you. Begin to see how your activities change, how your self talk changes and how life seems a little more free. Letting go of control, letting go to what is, being more authentic and less how you think you should be. It is a beautiful way to be.

Love and light,


Aug. 30, 2010

What is it that we fear most?

I have been pondering a lot of things lately. I have a dear friend that always tells me, what do you want Erin? What do you really want? I said I want private yoga clients. She said why? Because, that way I will have consistent money coming in and will be able to live my life and go travel. Why, she asked. Because I want to travel. After some serious questions, we finally got to what it is that I really be free, to have that freedom some people I know have, to just go live in another country for a bit, experience a new way of life. My roommate tells me it is in my blood to travel, I believe her. My body aches for it, I feel so alive when I travel. I did not even realize it, but I had a fear of being trapped, or stuck. I thought that by figuring out that I want private yoga clients that that would help me achieve my final goal, of being able to travel. But ultimately what I wanted was to be able to travel around the world doing what I love. Consequently I have not been getting any private yoga clients, why because my fear was getting in the way. Energy flows where attention goes. So my attention, whether I was aware of it or not, was going to my fear of being trapped. Of being stuck in one place, unable to afford to travel and do what I love to do most. Which would ultimately would have been what might have happened, had I not gotten clear about it. Once I got clear and realized what was happening, I changed where my energy was going. Now I focus more on what I really want and the rest will follow. It is about getting clear of what it is that we really want and stripping away the things we think that we think will get us to what we really want.

Energy flows where attention goes. Getting clear and focusing on what we really want will begin to change everything. As we continue to get really clear inside, the outside will just automatically change. It is just a law of nature really.

Love and Light,


Stop Living in What if and Start Living in What IS!

The land of what ifs can trap us. It is constantly asking questions like well if I do this then what if this happens, or what if that happens? What is that doing, it is keeping us in our minds, trying to piece everything together and not really living in the moment. When we are sitting there mulling over every possible outcome we are not really in the moment of just being with what is. We are truly missing out. Besides we can always ask the question what if we die tomorrow? If you are really going to live in the land of what if then you need to ask yourself that question. That is a reality, we could die tomorrow, so why ponder every possible outcome under the sun for your current situation? Stop living in what if. It is a trap. It is your mind trying to control every situation. Instead when you feel yourself going there, pondering every reason to not do something, stop and tune into your heart. Get quiet and listen to what your heart wants. It is trying to tell you something, but the incessant mind chatter is blocking that out. There is no what if, there is only what is. Listen to your heart, get out of your mind. You will feel more peace and joy when you do.

Love and Light,


July 19, 2010

Getting Back to Love

I talked with my Grandma today. I have to admit she has always been one of my role models. Such a loving and giving person to everyone. Her heart is always open and she is a really good representation of how if you give, you receive in so many ways. But the key is giving without expecting. She told me how this past December they had a huge blizzard in Iowa, where she lives. She lives out in the country where there are not many houses around. A man got his car stuck and needed a place to stay through the night, because the storm was very severe. My grandma took him in, not sure what she was getting herself into, but knowing that if she, or anyone in her family was in the same condition, she would hope someone else would do the same thing. The man turned out to be very nice and wanted to repay her, she simply said no, but you can donate any money that you would give to me to our local library. He did and wrote a very nice letter saying that he would pass on the opportunity to help someone else in any way that he could. One act of kindness that causes a chain reaction and makes us open our hearts and our doors to someone in need. I am reminded, as of course we need to be careful in doing so, that giving in such a way and having faith that you will be ok, is such an act of surrender and love. Being open and surrendering to what is, (good or bad) is really the only way to live. We have to do so in order to move forward, to get unstuck, to live in a way that we never have before.

I am reminded of how I can surrender more in my life and get back to love. Love, not just in a relationship sense, but love in all aspects of life. Living in love with Everything...your drive to work, doing the dishes, talking on the phone, your job, cleaning your house, etc. It just pays off in the end (not to mention on your health) to be open and in love with everything, even the bad stuff. It is all here to help us along our path and to move us in the direction that we were born to go.

I ask that you do me a favor, as Valentine's Day is quickly approaching. Instead of getting mad at something, or someone that you usually get mad at, just let it go. Just smile, or even laugh at the situation and move on. Just see how the situation works out if you do that. Just let it go with love. And then turn around and use that love to do something nice for someone that you do not know. See how that makes them feel. Because as we give more love out into the world, we will get more love in return. Let's make every day a Love Day.

Feb. 11, 2010

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

25 Random Thoughts

1. Dirty chai lattes (with a shot of espresso) make me smile
2. Yoga has changed me for the better
3. I love where I live
4. I love seeing the synchronicity
5. A warm brownie and ice cream is my favorite dessert
6. Sitting on a comfy couch in a coffee shop with strangers is weird, but cool
7. Beach cruising makes me feel like a kid
8. People are too focused on making money and not on what their heart desires
9. They say the economy is bad, but who are "they?"
10. How does one loose oneself?
11. It is my dog's birthday today
12. If one looses oneself, where does one go?
13. Our souls always let us know what we need to be doing, we just don't always listen
14. How can one believe in energy and not believe in a higher source of it?
15. Grounding myself is something I have to work on daily
16. Staying focused is my goal of the month
17. Stopping and smelling the flowers is my second goal, of my life
18. Just doing the work, good or bad, is important, just get up and write. Period.
19. I look at really cool paintings and want to recreate them for my wall
20. I think walking around thrift stores, or antique stores is really relaxing
21. I want to swim with dolphins someday
22. I like inspiring people with something to say, I want to pick their brain
23. I love the amazing people in my life
24. I love transformation and getting back to your true self, the one that was lost somehow
25. When you find your true self, you think, you were here all along, what happened?

What's your numb of choice?

As I have been diving into this writing process called the Artist's Way (a 12 week program with exercises for helping blocked creatives) I have seen how I use just about anything to keep myself from doing the work and just sitting and writing. I will talk to a friend for hours, watch a movie, read a book for hours, get on facebook, eat sugar, go out with friends. Not that any of these things are bad, but you start to see a pattern in yourself after a while. You notice when you have set out time to do important things like write, or something creative, you suddenly find a million other things to do. This is part of being blocked. This is not just in a writing sense, but in many aspects of our life. Now I am not saying that you should sit reclusively locked in your room, void of tv, sugar and friends, but I am saying to become aware of what is keeping you blocked, most importantly what is keeping you blocked from the source of all creativity and life. What is making you fight to stay away from that source, from that light? Some people sit and watch tv endlessly, some eat their way through and others drink or smoke until they are in an oblivion. The point here is that everything is great in moderation, but if you have to do something consistently to function in this world, then it is time to look at why. I realized that I have been numbing myself with many things for many years and it is hard to come back into the world after you have done that. It is a scary thing, but it is necessary for each one of us to do if we are going to fulfill our job here on this planet. We all have a pure light that is in us that is waiting to shine out into the world and fulfill more than our mind can even imagine. What is keeping you from that light? Take time out today to think about that and maybe, before you turn on the tv this evening, instead you will sit and meditate and quiet the mind even for 5 minutes of its incessant chatter and just be with yourself and that light inside of you. Take this time to ask yourself "what do I want?" and "what am I numbing myself from?" You may be very surprised at the answer. It does not take much to make a little shift in our consciousness.

Love and light,


What happened to being feminine?

I think it is very important to talk for a moment about something that more and more women I run into are agreeing with me on. That our society has lost touch with the feminine. We live in a very masculine world. A world where women have to enter into the work world and try to make it "in a man's world." We often hear that, and don't get me wrong it is amazing that women have been able to do that and they are really making strides in the workforce and getting treated well. But what happens to the feminine qualities of a women when she is forced to work really hard, exerting her masculine energy all day? The problem is that many women are out of touch with their femininity and it is a growing problem. Women are not necessarily happy because they are not able to express themselves in the very way that they were meant to and have been for centuries. To top it off, there is a growing number of men, that are used to (or have adjusted to) the fact that women are more in their masculine energy, so they have switched into more of a feminine energy. Therefore turning the tables and creating a lot of confusion between men and women and who is supposed to be doing what and how are we supposed to act, etc. Unfortunately it is a huge problem and needs to be addressed. The biggest thing I think women can do for themselves is to give yourself time out of each day to just be in your feminine nature. Dancing, singing, gardening, doing something that makes you feel really good. The biggest thing women can do for men is to just let them be men.

I think an example is needed here. So let's say you are in the middle of standing on a ladder trying to change a lightbulb and your man comes in and says, let me do that, you are going to hurt yourself. You get offended and say "what you don't think I am capable of changing a lightbulb?" "I've got it." This would not be a feminine way of handling the situation, this would be the independent woman saying I can do anything a man can. To stay in the feminine nature, which is what I am talking about here, instead, say thank you so much and get off the ladder and let him change the lightbulb. This is the essence of a masculine man, he wants to help and he wants to do manly things. He wants to know that there are things that you can't do that he can, because if you can do everything why do you need him around anyway? Then after he is done changing the lightbulb don't forget to shower him with kisses and tell him he is your hero. This is a women being in her feminine nature. There are going to be times (many times) when you can do whatever the task is at hand, but letting the man be in his masculine nature allows you to stay in your feminine nature. The feminine nature is radiance, it is a glow that comes from within, a light that shines, that is as a woman your very essence. A lot of women in society are out of touch with that essence and it is very important to return to that. It is beautiful thing when the woman is allowing her feminine essence to shine through and the man is in his masculine. As women, we can still run companies, work all day and be in our masculine energy, but when we return home, it is vital to find a way to be in your feminine nature.

Am I saying that as women we have to stay home and cook and clean for the men in our lives while they work and do "manly" things? No, but I am saying that things need to change and there needs to be a balance and an understanding of what is our essential nature and how can we get back to that on a daily basis? Start off doing something small. Like dancing when you get home from work to a really uplifting song to have a nice bridge from the masculine type roll you have been in all day to a more feminine energy. It is just a thought. Ponder it and see if anything makes sense to you and then see where in your life you could be more in your feminine nature. It is a gift that we have to give. I think it is time to get back to the gift and give it to the world!